Strategies for Feeding a Picky Eater

Dealing with picky eaters is a frustrating parenting challenge. However, picky eating is a normal developmental stage, especially for toddlers. In fact, up to 50% of parents say their young children are picky eaters at some point. Although it’s a typical childhood phase, parents are often concerned about feeding a picky eater. 

They may worry that their child will lack important nutrients or miss out on the benefits of a well-balanced diet. And that’s understandable, good nutrition plays a crucial role in everything from brain development to immunity and energy levels. 

We know what kids should eat; it’s just not what they actually eat in real life. While you can have some amazing lunch ideas for picky eaters, your child may decide that he doesn’t like them once they hit the plate.

Here are five tips to make feeding a picky eater easier for you:

1. Know your role

A parent’s job is to decide what to serve, when to serve, and where to serve. Your child’s job is to decide whether they’ll eat and how much they’ll eat. This is known as the Division of Responsibility in feeding, a concept developed by nutritionist Ellyn Satter.

For example, you might choose to serve chicken, French fries, and broccoli for dinner at 6:00. Your child might decide to skip the chicken and fill up on French fries and broccoli.

That’s okay. The goal is to take the pressure off yourself and your child. Feeding a picky eater doesn’t mean coaxing them into every bite. Trust that your child won’t go hungry and will eat what they need from the available options.

(One important thing to keep in mind — while you can’t customize meals for each child, it’s important to include one food in each meal that you know your child has eaten before.)

2. Keep healthy foods accessible

Stock your pantry and fridge with a colorful array of fruits, veggies, and whole grains. Healthy foods for picky eaters should be easily accessible so your little one can grab a healthy snack whenever hunger strikes.

If your child has known allergies, it's important to find safe alternatives that still offer variety, color, and nutrition. For example, if your child is allergic to dairy, try fortified oat or almond milk; if eggs are off-limits, you can experiment with flaxseed replacements in baked goods. 

When feeding a picky eater, make it easy for them to explore good options without turning it into a negotiation. For example, cut-up veggies with hummus or a bowl of fruit on the table can encourage positive snacking without pressure.

3. Avoid power struggles

Resist the urge to turn mealtime into a battle. Avoid forcing your child to eat certain foods, and avoid using food as a reward or punishment. The goal is to create a relaxed atmosphere where exploring new foods is encouraged but not mandatory. Aim for exposure, not pressure.

Instead, try to make food fun by involving your child in the process. Let them help you pick fruits and vegetables, cook dinner, or even choose a new recipe to try together. Kids who are involved in the kitchen are more likely to try the food they helped make.

4. Lead by example

Your child learns most by observing, so do your best to be an open-minded eater and model healthy foods for picky eaters. That doesn’t mean you need to like all foods, but show your child that you’re willing to try new things. Eat with your child, share meals, and avoid negative food talk at the table.

Research shows that children are more likely to accept a food when they see their parents eating it regularly.

5. Don’t give up

If your child is totally disinterested in a new food, don’t give up! Try offering it again a few days later in a different texture, recipe, or preparation style.

Kids can take 10–15 exposures to accept a new food, or even more. One day they hate sweet potatoes; two weeks later, they love them roasted. Keep things low-pressure and stay consistent.

If you’ve tried all the tips above and you’re still concerned that your child isn’t receiving adequate nutrition, consider talking to your pediatrician or a registered dietitian. They can assess for any nutritional gaps and offer tailored feeding guidance.

Final thoughts

Remember, feeding a picky eater is often a temporary phase. Children usually expand their palate over time with continued exposure and support. You’ve got enough on your plate, so try not to stress too much. Stay patient, stay kind, and know that healthy habits often take time to grow.

If you feel overwhelmed or concerned about your child’s eating habits, you don’t have to navigate it alone. Hamaspik offers guidance, support, and referrals to help you better understand your child’s needs. 

Whether you’re dealing with extreme picky eating, sensory issues, or food allergies, we’re here to help you create a plan that supports your child’s growth and your peace of mind. Reach out today, we’re just a conversation away.

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